The Gift of Sex

I just finished reading the book The Gift of Sex: A Guide to Sexual Fulfillment, by Clifford & Joyce Penner. This book is great, and not only for the reasons you might think.

This is the most honest book I have ever read about sexual intimacy. These authors are practical, honest, straight-forward, while remaining faithful to God's plan for sex.

This book reinforced some things I already knew and provided fresh perspective on some other things. While I know that sexual intimacy is God-ordained for marriage, the Penners reminded me of why this is so and how God created sex specifically for a husband and wife.

Sex is designed to enhance intimacy between husband and wife. It creates bonds that were only intended to be shared with one person. True sexual intimacy requires open communication, honesty, and vulnerability.

In an age when sex is often treated more like recreation than a special, valued connection, this book reminds us that sex in a marriage can be powerful, wonderful, and better than anything we see on TV or in a movie.

True sexual satisfaction comes when it isn't about us. God created us to be giving beings who find our greatest satisfaction from sharing, not taking. Unfortunately, our culture surrounds us with messages that sex is about getting all we can out of it.

All you have to do is wait in line at a grocery story to see what I mean. It seems as though almost every women's or men's magazine has at least one article on the cover about how to have better sex. In our instant gratification society, we seek sexual fulfillment as another entitlement or service that brings us pleasure.

This flies in the face of God's plan and design for sex. It is really about our willingness to set aside our desires and connect with that one special person who we have committed our life to. It is intended to be a selfless act where we seek the pleasure of the other person to such as extent that we find pleasure as well. When we can do that, our marriages will be stronger, our families will be healthier, and we will be better prepared to live out the message of grace and mercy that God has authored for us.

Sexuality is not primarily about a physical act. It is about being created in the image of a relational God who calls us to share an intimacy with our spouse that reflects the nature of God.

shine!
Jason