Philosophy of Family Ministry

One more excerpt from my Family Ministry Plan for my grad class…

Ministry is most effective when it is framed in the context of family. For the last several decades, many churches and para-church organizations seem to have created and built ministries which effectively treat each member of the family as a separate entity. Ministries such as Promise Keepers, as well as traditional youth ministries and children’s ministries, focus primarily on the needs of specific ages and genders.

While addressing the needs of dads, moms, teenagers, children, and other groups of people has its place in the family of God, we cannot minister to these specific groups while essentially ignoring the complexity of the family as a living, breathing entity. Especially in the local congregation, we must have an overarching approach to ministry that includes and involves the entire family. When we miss that piece of the puzzle, we will often work to fix the pieces without considering how they will all fit back together.

Youth ministry seems to be one of the worst offenders when it comes to dissecting families. For years, traditional youth ministry has aimed to minister to teenagers while mostly ignoring – and sometimes even combating – parents. Many youth ministers have looked at parents as the enemy. This is an unhealthy approach that can place the youth minister at odds with those who should be his greatest ally. This segmented approach to youth ministry often ignores the fact that the most powerful minister in any teenager’s life should be her parents.

Family ministry demands a different approach for all ages and stages of life. It calls us to find ways to equip and empower every member of the nuclear family and the larger church family, regardless of a particular person’s family situation. Whether working with a single young adult, a young couple, families with children, families with teens, or adults in the later stages of life, we must consider the needs of the individuals as well as their role and needs in the context of the faith community. This is central to the purpose and function of family ministry.

Family ministry must seek ways not only to help the individual members of a family; it must also strive to help various family members work together in the process of spiritual formation. In the words of Diana Garland, "family ministry is helping persons live as they ought to in family life, according to the purposes and promises of God."¹

Essentially, family ministry is a place where people learn to live together according to God’s design for relationships. It must be proactive in an effort to prevent problems while also remaining prepared to react to situations that arise. Family ministry that only waits for disaster to strike or pretends everything is fine is destined to fail. One will always be running to catch up and the other will not be ready to deal with the realities of life in the 21^st century.

¹Diana Garland, Family Ministry (Downers Grove, Illinois: IVP Academic, 1999), 367

shine!
Jason